Attending a simple service for a friend in a funeral home, I was taken back by the minister. He didn’t know the deceased but that did not prevent him from putting on a pretty good show. The funeral home must have found him, if there’s such a thing as “Great Sermons When You Don’t Know the Person.com.”
She lived a long live and he began his sermon with the year she was born and significant events that occurred that year, in other words a trip down U.S. history’s lane, not hers. Still a baby, I wondered how that information related to her life other than more significant events occurred that year than her birth. He then proceeded to provide us with numbers, lots of numbers. “She did this and that, this year and so forth.” Why her height and weight were not provided to us still baffles me.
It was apparent to me that he had been given a data sheet about the deceased and then devised his little recitation. Unfortunately, it was not a testimony but a timetable of numbers and figures. (I expected a quiz at the small reception.)
Grading him while I was driving home is the following:
Periodic Smiles to Show that He Cares =A+
Ability to fill Twenty Minutes with Words =A+
Cleverly Avoiding Deceased’s Personality and Personhood =A+
Generalized Scriptural References Intended for Deceased of All Ages =A+
Ability to Collect $200.00 for a Thirty Minutes Performance =A+
She was a Milwaukee Public School teacher for over forty years, including grade school teaching and becoming a principal. She bought a duplex to care for both of her aging parents. She never married. She had strong opinions about education and childhood development. She will be missed but not because significant events occurred around her life but that she was a significant event.